The Blog of Kevin Gundred

2004-04-04T13:44:00.000-07:00

Wow, I haven't updated this thing in a long time. To me it feels like it was only yesterday when I put up my last post. I guess time flies when you having fun. I'm pretty tired of going to school nowadays. I just can't see why we have to do it. If anyone else feels like dropping out and going to Mexico to become a drug lord let me know, I might become your business partner. Not to much to talk about. My life is continuing to be sweeter that an apple pie and if anybody still reads this thing I'm sorry it has talking me so long to post something. Even if this post isn't that exciting.

-kevin

2004-01-24T23:22:00.000-08:00

You know how in movies there is always that guy who just gotten blown up but he is still alive and he looks all messed up? I mean really messed up. Like when the guy’s hand is over there and his legs are turned the other way and his face looks like a group of poodles has been gnawing on it for a while? But he is still just like moaning a little bit? Well, if my computer was in human form I think that’s what it would look like. Cause this thing has been crashing more times then I would like to say. I mean I was just writing an entry when the thing crashed so now it’s all lost. I guess I’ll just sum it up for you.

THE SUMMARY:
1. Finals are over with.
2. Zoolander is a funny/stupid movie.
3. My life is pretty sweet right now.
4. I hope your life is sweet too.
5. Computer crash…

Yup, that’s about all I got to writing before the computer went up and crashed on me. I don’t know if there is much more to say. I wish everyone a good next semester and maybe I wont wait so long to update again. That’s about it.

-kevin

2004-01-07T21:10:00.000-08:00

Today I was listening to the news and they were talking about how the government intercepted some terrorist threat or something and that’s why they raised our alert level to ORANGE. This happened I guess a couple weeks ago and as you all know nothing much out of the ordinary has happened. Nothing has blown up and no one has been killed. You know what I think is going on? I think some 12-year-old kids off in some country are playing a joke on the old USA. I think somehow or other they got their hands on some big radio and started a club called “Let’s freak out the USA.” All their club does is freak out the USA, that’s where the name comes from I reckon. Anyways, every Tuesday I bet these guys get together and gather round the radio and start yelling out random threats. I’m sure they have games like, “Who can raise the alert level the highest?” or “How many people can we cause to stop flying on planes?” I think a typical club meeting might go a little like this.

“Hey guys what’s up?”
“Not much man, you ready to get started?”
“Ya sure, I’ll go first. Just let me put on my terrorist voice.”— “We have been called to cause great destruction on the evil of the west.”
“That was a good one man, did you make up that evil of the west thing?”
“No, I heard that on some old karate movie.”
“Oh, sorry to stop you, keep going.”
—“Our people have been oppressed by the evil of the west for too long, it is now our time to come together and fight against them. I call my people to find any weapon they can and to cause havoc and destruction on the USA!”
“Nice one man, I’m sure you raised their alert level by at least one. Let me try to raise it up another notch.” – “Yes, our plans are going exactly as we thought. In a few weeks we will be ready to attack the USA with more destruction than they have ever seen. Buildings and walls will come tumbling down because of us. Mass hysteria will come over the public and they will be forced to revolt against their government and search for someone who can promise them peace. Then they will be right where we want them for our final blow…”

By this time the USA guy listening on the other end has already peed his pants and is about to push the button that will raise the alert level. Man, I think our country needs to chill out. We obviously did something to these people to piss them off; maybe trying to solve the problem rather than spend ZILLIONS of dollars on defense missiles that don’t work, would be a better plan for our country. Oh well, I guess we will never learn.

-kevin

2004-01-05T22:25:00.000-08:00

Tapioca. It looks disgusting and feels disgusting. I mean it looks like someone took fat and tried to boil it or something. It tastes ok I guess. Every time I bite into it I don’t know if I should be repulsed or enjoy it.

Well break is over and now it is back to school. My best advice is to zone out “Kevin Style.” Zoning out Kevin Style isn’t just your basic zone, no it’s much deeper than that. When you do the Kevin Style zone properly you don’t remember a thing about school. Sometimes this non-remembrance can span over weeks and weeks. Many a time have I awoken out of my zone and two or three weeks have past. I usually take the next few minutes to try and figure out where I am. I’m sure you all have seen me in this state of mind. Usually my eyes are staring off into space and one eyebrow is raised slightly higher than the other. I was taught this art by a very old and wise monk from Asia. The first time he made the zoning out face I just described, I had a great epiphany. I went to go tell him but instead of zoning out he had died. What an honorable way to go.

-kevin

2004-01-01T14:28:00.000-08:00

Today we will be sampling the mind of the Nunes. If you guys don't like it send him a bomb in the mail.

-kevin

The Nunes:

Well this is my first guest blog and I am a little nervous. Firstly I want to say I will probably look like an asshole. Secondly Gundred will probably edit this a little, making me look even more like an asshole. Thirdly I just want to give a shoutout to all my niggas.

We went to Sugar Bowl yesterday and watched the Sugar Bowl today. HA! Gundred is becoming a skiing fiend and I have been contacted by a few scouts about my hardcore snowboarding skills. I accidentally hit an old lady coming down the hill. "Bob" had an unfortunate ski malfunction and ended up in the bar for half the day while me and Gundred impressed onlooking pre-teen chicks. We also went to this lady's house and she said that I was a hardcore flirt and that people like me when they meet me but then grow to hate me (friggin Libra...) and that Gundred will forever dominate me when it comes to women. Son of a...

-Nunes, Guest Blogger.

P.S. First post of the new year. HA

2003-12-28T23:11:00.000-08:00

Well another Christmas has come and gone. It was a good Christmas, the kind you would tell your grandkids about. The kind of Christmas that you think about when you are drinking coco by the fire. The kind where… I guess Christmas was ok this year. Most of mine consisted of running away from my two little cousins. They have gotten so annoying and are seriously the loudest people on the planet. I mean if all kids are gonna be like this I think I’m gonna adopt a 21 year-old with his own apartment when I get older. No part of me wants to deal with a whiny little kid who runs around all day screaming and breaking things. But I guess if I did have a kid it would be MY little whiny kid and My kid that breaks things. I’m sure that would make it worth it.

Tomorrow I’m leaving to go spend a week at “Bob’s” place. Should be fun. The Nunes is gonna be there and I think we are gonna go snowboarding and such. Man “Bob’s” place has got to be the coolest location ever. Out in the wilderness with lots of dogs and not a lot of people. With a rope swing and miles and miles of trails to walk I can never find a dull moment there. If I’m not trying to shoot things with an assortment of BB guns I’m usually reading by the fire. Holy Crap will I be reading by the fire this time. I have like 20 chapters of Huck Fin to read. Man why did I wait till I’m going to “Bob’s” place to do all my homework? I know why, cause I’m cruising. I know it will all work out. No worries here.

The pain inside me is getting harder and harder to hide. The mask I wear is getting heavier and heavier.

-kevin

2003-12-24T21:08:00.000-08:00

Oh praise the Lord for the Reverend is here! The Reverend is here! Reverend Al Green has blessed our lowly ground with his genius music. Praise the Lord, praise the Lord! Let the music take you over and feel the warmth of heaven. Oh I say it again, Praise the Lord for Reverend Al Green is here!

-kevin

2003-12-23T22:30:00.000-08:00

Today I saw “Love Actually.” It was pretty good I would say. I mean it had its funny parts and its sad parts, but it was lacking in the blow stuff up and mass killings department. I think most people would think that “Love Actually” is a chick-flick. Well, it is pretty feminine but I think it’s on the boundary between a chick-flick and a “not chick-flick.” I guess I would recommend for people to go see it. And guys, if you don’t like the movie as a whole, there are still some pretty crazy nudity parts. I mean I was blown away by how much there was.

Christmas Eve is tomorrow. The time for last minute shopping and last minute sneaking around the house to see what you parents got you. I don’t have a clue what my parents got me. I mean I didn’t even think they were getting me anything cause they got me golf clubs and golf shoes a while ago. But then my mom was talking to me and said,” Don’t go in that room, some of you presents are there.” Maybe they forgot or maybe they just can’t resist giving me gifts. I know I would have a hard time not getting me a gift. My sister is also coming home for the holidays tomorrow. Too bad a nasty surprise awaits her (only Andrea, Chris, and Athena know what I’m talking about). Man this Christmas I have had to work the most for sure. Well actually I haven’t been working that much but my mom has made me stay home all day just incase she needs me. This has restricted me from going out with friends 24/7 and it’s kinda getting me down. But it’s ok, I’m cruising, no worries.

My first tutoring gig went great and the money is in the bank. All I have got to say is that the problem is with the teachers not the kids. I showed my guy how to do it and he had it by the horns in no time. I think it’s because most kids don’t pay attention that well during class. I know I don’t sometimes. Freak, freak, and more freak. I still haven’t started on my Spanish project, or done my English shit, or studied for tests I need to makeup. Sounds like I got a merry Christmas ahead of me.

-kevin

2003-12-22T13:31:00.000-08:00

I saw Lord Of the Rings and it was pretty good. Now I’m not the biggest fan of all that stuff, but it was still pretty enjoyable. I mean if you put a Viking helmet on someone and then have them fight some ugly orc, I think most people will like it. Man my first tutoring session is today. I hope it goes well. It should be good; I don’t think it will be that hard or anything.

Got all of my Christmas shopping done today. It cost me like 75 dollars. I guess that isn’t too bad. It’s still a lot of money though. It’s so hard to get people over the age of 10 presents these days. I mean once you past 10 you don’t have a list of every action figure, or doll, that you want. I mean I only have one thing I really want this Christmas. So when my mom says make a list, I can’t really make one. I think everyone should just give people money. It would be fast and easy and the malls wouldn’t be so darn crowded. Chris and I went to the mall a couple days ago to get birthday presents for these girls and it was crowded to the max. I could barely even see in front of me. The mall was just this big room filled with a blob of clothes, hair, noise, and smells. The parking lot was even worse. Chris luckily found a spot right next to Nordstroms so it was ok. Other people were searching forever. And there was constantly like ten cars driving up and down each parking aisle looking for spots. It made me want a rocket launcher so I could blow all the cars up that were in our way.

-kevin

2003-12-18T19:38:00.000-08:00

Man BREAK is here yay!!! Well I guess it’s not here for you guys yet, but it is for me. You see yesterday I came home feeling like I was about to faint or something. It was pretty crazy. I was colder than a hobo in San Francisco and I just couldn’t stop shivering. When I got home I slept for like 3 hours and then woke up feeling worse. I took my temp and I was at a blistering 102. something degrees. I felt like a 40 year old women going through hot flashes. But it seems my immune system is hella good cause by 9:00 o’clock I was back to a regular temperature and I was feeling much better. I really do think I have a pretty good immune system cause I don’t have any memories of me having a cold or flu for more than a day. I asked my mom and she said she couldn’t remember anything like that either. The only down side to me missing school today is over break I’m gonna have to do a Spanish project and re-study for my Spanish and Chemistry tests that I’ll have to take when I get back.

Woohoo!!! Tomorrow I’m caroling in San Francisco all day. Should be uber-fun. So no school tomorrow either. I hope you guys have a fun last day before break, I know I will. Till we meet again, peace.

-kevin

2003-12-15T22:04:00.000-08:00

Wow, today I got my first job. I’m gonna be a tutor for kids in the need of a little extra help on the side. Should be pretty fun and rewarding. There was no interview, no grades required, no work permit required, and it’s gonna pay me nine dollars an hour. Man the crazy thing is I turned in my application today and I got my first tutoree today. That’s some pretty fast results if you ask me. Just think, if I get like 3 kids to tutor a week that is 27 bucks. No tax to the government, it’s under the table baby, it’s just for me me me!!! I mean when you are not paying rent or anything, and your only 16 years old, 27 bucks a week is pretty sweet. Heck, maybe I’ll get as good as Jooho and be able to charge like 30+ dollars an hour. Then I would really be shoveling it in. Not with a small shovel, but with a huge ass shovel. I gotta go think of ways to be a good tutor. I think I’ll ask the master for some help. Oh, if you didn’t know, Jooho is the master.

-kevin

2003-12-14T21:55:00.000-08:00

Well I guess the big story right now is that Saddam Hussein was captured by US troops in Iraq. Now at first I didn’t think Saddam Hussein would ever be found but I guess I was wrong. I mean if I had as much money as that guy did I would have built a whole city underground. I would have started building it as soon as I got into office. Instead of building it under Iraq I would have built in under Iran though. I would have built it there because I would know sooner or later people would come looking for me because I would be a ruthless bastard who killed people left and right for no reason. I mean who would think to look for Saddam Hussein in a secret city under Iran? Well I guess I would think to look there, since it is my idea and all, but I don’t think Bush would have ever guessed that. In fact, I don’t think Bush even knows how to think. Well, maybe he does know how to think, but I doubt he can think much better than a monkey, cause that is what he looks like. Anyways back to Saddam getting caught.

Here is how we found him:

In the last couple of weeks the military had apprehended some of Hussein’s bodyguards, family, and “other” people connected to him. While interrogating these following people the military learned some key facts about Hussein’s location. They learned that he was most likely living in Adwar, which is few more than 10 miles from his hometown Tikrit. After learning the possible whereabouts of Hussein they wanted to go search for him. They looked to Bush to give them their all important mission name. The name that sprung out of Mr. Bush’s head was Operation Red Dawn. What a name, almost as good as the mission name Operation Iraqi Freedom. Anyways, some time ago six hundred soldiers set out to Adwar to look at two possible locations where Saddam might be hiding. The attempt failed and it made Mr. Bush frown. When all looked hopeless a second search in Adwar struck gold. Gold as in Saddam Hussein. It seemed he was living in a two-room shack on a sheep farm. But it seems Hussein almost followed my underground city plan because within his shack was a deep hole he had dug for himself. To hide this hole from onlookers he covered it with a rug and then put a small styrofoam square on top of the rug. It seemed this wasn’t enough to stump the soldiers and soon enough they were hauling Hussein out of his hole. Saddam was armed with a pistol but he showed no resistance. Along with two AK-47s, a sum of $750 thousand was also found on the premises. I guess that about it guys, ya I got the story out even before the papers did. That’s just how good I am.

-kevin a.k.a. “white lightning”

2003-12-10T22:07:00.000-08:00

Man TV is covered with reality TV shows these days. They aren’t even good but you just can’t stop watching them cause they are “real.” The hell they are real. Like freaking survivor, you are not surviving all by yourself if you get to play games for rice and other food items. If I had a reality show it would be freaking crazy. The people on it would have to sign hecka stuff incase they died and crap. I think it would go a little something like this…

THE ULTIMATE TEST
First off there would be six contestants. Two of them would be macho people, two of them would be “normal” people, and the last two would be “big boned” people. Then I would put them on an island with no food and no nothing. The only other people on the island would be the cameramen. The show would figure out who would be best suited to survive on an island. Would it be macho, normal, or fat people? Think of all the possibilities. The fat people could overpower the normal people and eat them cause they would be hungry. Or the macho people could beat up the normal people and give them to the fat people. I don’t think the macho people would be very smart, since macho people usually aren’t, so I think they would die pretty quickly as well. They would probably try to lift up some great big rock and it would end up breaking their backs or something. In fact, I think the fat people would most likely survive. I mean food would always be on their minds so they probably wouldn’t starve. They would probably eat the macho people after they broke their backs and then eat up everything else they could find. Then just when you thought they didn’t have any food left they would eat the cameramen too!!! Then we wouldn’t have any footage and the show would just become some dark secret of my past. Then the island would become inhabited by the fat people kids and it would create a race of fat savage beasts that eat a lot. Then in like 20 years some ship on a cruise would land there and then the fat beasts would eat all the cruise people. They some dude would probably make a movie out of it called,” Jurass-is-fat Park.”

-kevin

2003-12-09T22:26:00.000-08:00

Man tonight I had an awesome filming session with Chris and Sean. Chris Palia and Sean Ryan that is. I would tell you all about it but then I would be ruining the surprise for the Winter Assembly Broadcast. I don’t think I will even be there for the Winter Assembly. I think I’ll be in San Francisco singing for people who pay us money or something. Today we sang for old people during fourth period and it was ok I guess. I had a solo and it went pretty good. The old people kinda moved their faces when I sang it. For old people I’m thinking that’s pretty good. I mean when I’m old I aint gonna go around moving my face for every little thing, it’s gonna have to be pretty freaking special.

Today I had a test in Pre Cal and I was pretty scared going into the test. You see I didn’t do half of my homework and I had missed lessons due to caroling and stuff. I thought I wouldn’t know the material but it turned out I did and I think I did well on it. Today was also the first mandatory POPs concert rehearsal. It was pretty boring and Kevin Teel and I almost left to go play Madden at some guys house but he wouldn’t answer his phone so we didn’t go. My parents and I watched the second Matrix a couple nights ago and it made me pretty uncomfortable. I mean I don’t know about you guys but seeing Neo have sex with Trinity while I’m sitting next to my mom isn’t my idea of fun. I kept fidgeting and I didn’t know if I should smile, frown, or not react. I decided to not react and my mom didn’t say anything so from now on I’m not reacting to anything while my mom is around. Well freak, its 10:21 in the pm I gotta go and get in my bed. I don’t think homework has made me stay up past like 11:00pm this year. So for all of you who are reading this at 1:00am in the morning, know I’m in my bed sleeping like an adolescent.

-kevin

2003-12-08T21:04:00.000-08:00

Tonight I’m going to talk about a book I once saw. It’s title was Don’t sweat the small stuff. I guess my mom got this book a few years ago but I don’t think she ever read it. Do you wanna know why I don’t think she read it? CAUSE SHE IS A FREAKING IDIOT AND SWEATS LIKE A BIG SWEATY PIG WHO JUST RAN FIFTY FREAKING MILES ABOUT THE SMALLEST THINGS IT WOULD TAKE A FREAKING MICROSCOPE TO SEE THEM! Ok, maybe that sounded harsh, but if you have heard any of my “mom” horror stories you would know what I was talking about. For those of you who haven’t heard my horror stories let me tell you something that happened only a few minutes ago…

First you have to know that I take voice lessons… I take voice lessons. Second you should know that I take them on Thursdays. Ok, now we can get started.

Tonight my mom found out that I have doctor’s appointment on Thursday, which might interfere with my lesson. So my mom started to freak out and asked me what we should do. I told her that I could talk to Pam, my voice teacher, and see if I could miss my lesson on Thursday. Then she asked me what day I could do the lesson on if the one on Thursday was canceled. I told her that I was kinda busy and that maybe I could just skip it this week. At this point my mom’s brain overloaded, like it usually does, and she said,” Well then, what would you do if I just stopped letting you have lessons?” So I told her it wouldn’t be a super big deal. I mean I don’t want to stop, but if she “made” me stop, which is what she said in her question to me, I wouldn’t cry about it or anything. Of course since my mom read the Don’t sweat the small stuff book so well, she exploded and said I was making horrible decisions. She said I was throwing away my talent and that I would lose my creative outlet. Next she called in my dad, and since my mom is a raving lunatic sometimes who doesn’t make any sense, he agreed with what I had to say. My mom tried to bring up some example about how parents telling their kids not to take drugs was somehow related to my mom telling me how not taking lessons was bad. Let me remind you again that I never said I didn’t want to take lessons. All I said was that if my mom stopped me from taking them I wouldn’t cry about it. Of course since her drug example was so dumb it hurt my head I said that it didn’t apply to what we were talking about. My dad seconded this and that’s when my mom went on super duper explode mode. She said that my dad and I were against her, which we are not, but the stuff and ideas that come out of her head are so dumb me and my dad usually agree that they are dumb so it might seem like we are against her but we aren’t. I mean if she could come up with one freaking idea that made sense my dad and I would agree with her. She has just failed to do this and that is why she thinks we are plotting against her. Anyways, before she left the table, she told me she was out of my life and done raising me. Now to you people reading this that might sound bad, but she says that about once a day so believe me it means nothing.

You may think I might feel bad right now but I don’t. This is a pretty pedestrian(Go SATs) event at my house so I’m not that moved by it. In fact this happens to me so much I have developed away to not be affected by things. I call it “cruising” and you can talk to Andrea Blunt and various other people about the specifics of it. It basically means that shit that doesn’t mean shit doesn’t affect me. So right now I’m not depressed but rather I’m happy and in a good mood. My mom sure shows me what not to become when I get older. I don’t want you to get the wrong idea about me and my mom’s relationship or anything. I mean I don’t hate her ALL the time, but at certain times I have to say I could do without her for the rest of my life. Well, I got to go and laugh myself to sleep. It feels good to get this shit out.

-kevin

2003-11-30T19:08:00.000-08:00

My blog is in a coma. Who knows how long it will be before it wakes up?

-kevin

2003-11-25T21:40:00.000-08:00

Today is the end to a very short week. My week consisted of no homework and a Spanish test. Was the test hard? No, it was by far one of the easiest tests I have ever taken in Spanish. Some of my other friends had tests up the whazoo these past two days. I feel sorry for them and can only imagine what more than two tests in one-day feels like. I am kinda scared for when I got to college. I mean I don’t think I’ve ever had a “hard” teacher. Hopefully my luck will follow me throughout my life and I wont ever have to “bust my ass”.

If anyone knows of a place where we could have a bonfire, please contact me. I found an untapped source of boxes I forgot about and I got about 10 to light up. I wonder if the smoke will smell like apples and bananas? If it did that would be funny. Another funny thing is that I locked my keys in my car today. I do that so much it isn’t funny. It’s ok though because I have a hide-a-key under my car so I just get that. That probably looks weird. It would look like a guy walking over to a car, looking through the windshield a little and then just popping under the car for a little bit. Then the guy would pop back up, remove a key from a small black box, open the car, and drive away. What else can you expect from CASTRO TOWN.

-kevin

2003-11-23T11:31:00.000-08:00

Kevin’s Update:

On Friday I went to the eye doctor. Why did I go to the eye doctor? Good question. Well lately I have been experiencing something like double vision and I was kinda getting freaked out about it. Around that time I noticed one of my medications had “impaired vision” as one of it’s side effects. So I stopped talking the medication. When I got my eyes examined we found out that the medicine had something to do with the vision problems but it wasn’t the key factor. It seems that I have perfect vision in my left eye and only 95% vision in my right eye. This along with the side effects of the medication was the cause of my vision problems. No I’m back on the med cause my nose has been going crazy. I would rather not see so well then be sniffling like a moron all day.

Last night I tried Phah. I don’t know how to spell it but it was pretty good. It’s Vietnamese food. It’s pretty crazy. You get this big bowl filled with noodles and meat and then you put like this little branch with leaves in it for flavor and they have crazy hot sauce too. I also heard about the shooting last night after we went to dinner. If you haven’t heard about the shooting there was one last night in CV. It happened in Seven Hills and it left one man dead and one car “flipped” (that was from the inside reporting of Dan Haiek). I guess we should call Castro Valley “CASTRO TOWN” now, huh?

I come from CASTRO TOWN, you know down in the cuts
We got shootings and hookers to light up the night
When I cruise around in my ’83 I keep a gun in my pocket cause I’m a P-I-M-P
If you mess with me you mess with death
I’ll shoot you like I shot your mom
So when you come on down to CASTRO TOWN
Watch out for WHITE LIGHTNING cause he’ll beat your ass

-kevin

2003-11-19T19:20:00.000-08:00

For some reason I have been more busy than Santa on Christmas for the past week. I don't know what the hell is going on but it better stop pretty soon. I'm counting on it stopping 11/22/03. So stop by then for an updated blog.

-kevin

2003-11-15T15:41:00.000-08:00

Sushi. Most people like it, but some people don’t like it. I am sad to say that I am one of those people that don’t like it. I tried it for my first time last night. I was at Ichiban/ Bonjovi with Chris, his cousin and friends. I liked the other stuff I ordered but when I bit into my first Californian Roll, I knew right away we weren’t going to have a good relationship:

First the sushi was like,” Damn Kevin’s mouth you don’t eat me enough.”

Then my mouth was like,” Well, I don’t like you that much and I have other foods
I need to eat.”

Then the sushi said,” Well you don’t spend enough time with me. If you did you might like me more.”

Next I was like,” Well what do you want me to do, spend 95% of my time eating you and only 5% of my time eating the foods I already like? Is that what you want me to do?”

Luckily at this moment a kid walked in with an m16 and blew the sushi to smithereens. Sorry, my sushi story was beginning to be being influenced by a movie I saw last night. The movie was about a school shooting and it was pretty freaking crazy. I don’t know about you guys but a school shooting is definitely on my “Things I don’t want to happen to my school” list. I still can’t figure out how someone could get so screwed up that they would do something like that. But I guess it’s possible.

On a lighter note, I played some B-ball today with Joohoo, Ken, and Jennifer. By the end of the game they were calling me “White Lightning.” Ok, maybe they didn’t call me “White Lightning”, but my team still won anyway. If they did make a nickname for me it would probably just be “White”, cause I was wearing some shorts and let me just say I could use a tan.

-kevin

2003-11-13T19:42:00.000-08:00

Today I would like to write about bathroom talk, the talk that goes on inside of a men’s bathroom. Today I had my worse case of it and I want to make sure it never happens to any one else. It all started after school, which is the primary time I go to the bathroom. I hade some camera equipment with me because Chris and I were going to film Volleyball after school. I guess someone from one of the stalls could see the equipment because all of the sudden I heard,” Hey, that’s a camera. Do you film stuff?” I was in such a shock all I could mutter was,” Ya.” You see when someone talks to you while you are going to the bathroom it is like someone TALKING TO YOU WHILE YOU ARE GOING TO THE BATHROOM. It isn’t a very relaxed time. Plus when someone talks to you, you have to look at them for a second. I mean to acknowledge them and all. And who wants to look at some guy taking a leak? More importantly, who wants to be looked at by some guy taking a leak? The whole mess puts you in a very weird situation. You don’t really know what to do. You start to act all casual and you put your hand on the wall and you start shrugging all the time. So if anyone who reads this ever sees me in a bathroom don’t talk to me, I don’t really like to touch the walls, since they are all gross.

-kevin

2003-11-11T19:10:00.000-08:00

Man, some fun stuff happened last night. It started when I went over to Matt’s house to help film a segment for the broadcast. We would have started to film right away, but we had to wait for Chris to come over. While we waited for Chris, Matt was played DEFEND YOUR CASTLE, and I played GTA VICE CITY. When Chris showed up we got into character and shot whatever it was we needed to shoot. By the time we were done it was around 11:15pm. Matt kicked us out of his house and that was when the real fun started to happen.

Real Fun Event Number One:
So as me and Chris are leaving I’m like,” Hey Chris, are you hungry?” Then Chris was like,” Ya, I could have something to eat.” Then I told him to lead the way to some food joint and that I would follow him. When I was about to leave I looked up and saw Chris running towards my car. When he got there he asked me if he could get on top of my car. I was like sure and he told me to drive around for a bit. So after Chris secured himself to the top of my car I started driving pretty fast. I went into a couple courts and busted some fat U-turns like I was racing or something. After a while I pulled up next to his car and he jumped off and said that riding on top of my car was pretty fun.

Real Fun Even Number Two:
As I said before Chris and I were going to go find someplace to eat. After many wasted minutes of searching we decided to go to Jack n’ the Box. Since it was like 11:30pm only the drive-threw was open. We decided to go in just one car and the car that was picked was mine. Next we got in my car, counted our money, and thought of what we would order. We decided on two ultimate cheeseburgers minus the mustard and some fries. As we pulled up to the place where you order your food I pressed the button that rolls down the window. To my surprise the window didn’t roll down. I tried it again and again but I had no success. I then tried the other windows. Of course they all worked, but my window, the one I needed to order our food, did not. So I had to improvise. As I pulled up to the order-o-matic I casually opened my door. I think it was pretty hard for the lady to hear our order cause Chris and me were laughing like madmen. It was the same story when we got our food. I forgot to mention that I was wearing a bathrobe during all of this. Just imagine giving food to someone in a janky car who is wearing a bathrobe and who can’t stop laughing.

-kevin

2003-11-09T18:13:00.000-08:00

College Life!!! I just spent the weekend at my sister’s house in Santa Cruz and all I got to say is College Life Rules! Tonight I’m going to give you an in-depth report on college life. No matter what you have heard from anyone before, this is
THE SECRET TO GREAT COLLEGE LIFE

The secret to college life is to get a nice old rundown house. A house that has a nice paint job is much to fancy for college. A house that is half blue and half green, and that is yellow under the peeling paint, is much more suitable. If your house is too fancy, you limit how much fun you can have. For example, if you lived in a nice house and you accidentally drove you car into the side of it you would probably be pretty mad. If you lived in a crappy house and did the same thing you would just cover the hole with a purple sheet and call it your side door. Parties are also much better in a crappy house. Let’s say one of your friends accidentally pukes into your bathtub. In a crappy house you could make a game out of it and have all your other friends puke in the bathtub too. Then you could bet someone to take a bath in it. When you would need to clean up the mess you could just pack your stuff in your car and drive off to find anther crappy house to rent. If this happened in a nice house you wouldn’t be able to just leave because the owner of the house wouldn’t be a dope-head and would have made you sign a contract. I guess that is pretty much the secret to college life, just get a crappy house. I got to go now cause my friend just finished bathing in the puke-bath and I don’t really want to pay him the five bucks.

-kevin

2003-11-05T19:42:00.000-08:00

Today I had a pretty scary driving experience. You see today was the forth time I went to Albertsons to collect boxes for Key Club and they barely fit in my car with all the other boxes. I don’t mean like they didn’t fit in my trunk, I mean they barely fit in my WHOLE car. All of my trunk, all of my back seat, and my passenger seat. ALL FULL!!! I couldn’t see anywhere but straight and to the left. It was pretty freaking scary. Since I had all these boxes I decided to drop them off at that dude’s house I talked about before. Turns out I know the guy. Anyways, the ride to his house was crazy. I couldn’t see shit, as I mentioned before, and almost got into a huge crash. Well actually, I didn’t almost get in a huge crash, in fact nothing happened at all. It was still kinda scary.

Tomorrow I’m going to interview some millionaire real estate guy along with Dan and Chad. So by Friday I’ll know how to become a millionaire. That’s gonna be sick. If anyone else wants to know how to become a millionaire, it’s gonna cost you. I have to go do some homework right now. I wont have to do any more homework after tonight though, since I’ll know how to become a millionaire and all.

-kevin

2003-11-04T19:27:00.000-08:00

I forgot to mention one of my golfing highlights in my last blog. I freaking hit a bird!!! It was either a seagull or some type of goose/duck. Ya it was pretty sick. For a while I thought it was dead but it turned out to be only slightly injured. It all started on the 8th hole, which is a Par 4. It was 250 yards or something so I brought out my driver. I smashed it good but it started to veer to the right near the end of its flight. This wasn’t a good thing since “to the right” there is a very big collection of water. I could tell the ball would land about 6 feet from the edge of the water but I was still worried that it might bounce into the H2O. As the ball started its decent I noticed there was a large patch of birds where I thought it might land. Not to my surprise the ball ripped into one of the birds and feathers went flying everywhere. The bird kinda flopped around for a while but I really couldn’t tell what it was doing since I was about two football fields away from it. Soon after the ball hit the bird all the other birds got in a big circle around it. It looked like they were all about to jump in and eat it or something. When I went to find my ball I saw a bunch of feathers around it but no dead bird. I guess the bird lived to get hit and die another day. I would say that’s what you get for living on a golf course.

-kevin

2003-11-03T19:28:00.000-08:00

Looks like I got all A’s on my report card except in Pre-cal. I recently have been getting A’s on all my tests in Pre-cal, but during the beginning of the year I was getting all C’s. I guess the number of A’s I got wasn’t enough to bump my grade up past the 90% mark. Oh well, I don’t care at all. On a completely different note, my family got a new phone. In fact it is just a few inches away from where I am sitting. It’s our first cordless phone we have ever had. Yup, I know that’s hard to believe but it’s true. You see my parents don’t like to buy things unless they have too. I mean our microwave has got to be at least 15 years old. I’m surprised it can still fry stuff. But, when something breaks, my parents make sure to buy something that will last as long as the previous appliance. Just last year our refrigerator broke so my dad went and bought a nice new one. And when my dad’s old van broke down, he went and bought a new $50 thousand dollar truck. That truck is hella sick. All leather, six CD changer, and a mega sounds system. He is kinda crazy about it though. No one else in the family has driven it and he has professionals re-wax and re-finish it like once a month. He is always yelling about little scratches on it and junk. One time we went 4-wheeling in it and the brush started to get all dense and he was like,” Maybe we should go back, all these branches could scratch the car.” So we went back, it was kinda lame.

First pops rehearsal was today. It went ok and all. All we did was read through the script, nothing much happened. If I crash into anyone’s car in the next few weeks blame it on Key Club. I got so many freakin banana, apple, and potato boxes in my car I can’t see a darned thing. Oh well, all I have to do to get rid of them is drop them off at some dude’s house. But, that would involve having to call him up and I aint to fond of calling up strangers who’ve got a thing for used boxes.

-kevin

2003-11-01T14:57:00.000-08:00

Today my mom told me that I have been “out” of the house too much lately and that I need to stay home today. I guess I’ll talk about my day yesterday then. It started off pretty good cause me and my dad went golfing in the morning. It was my second time on the course and I did a lot better than last time. I made my first par, which was pretty sick, especially how I did it. It was on a par 4 that was 351+ yards or something. I hit a pretty nice drive off the tee and had about 140 yards left to the pin. Unfortunately, my drive went a little to the right and a tree was in my way so all I could do was hit it back onto the fairway. For my third shot I thought I would hit a nice 8-iron. I lined myself up with the target and smacked the ball pretty good. I saw it land on the green so I was pretty happy, due to a hill I couldn’t see exactly where the ball was from where I was standing. Next I walked over to the green to see where my ball was. I scanned the whole green and couldn’t see it. I was about to check if it had bounced beyond the green but then something near the pin caught my eye. I looked closer and noticed that there were to semi-circles on either side of the flagpole. I thought to myself,” No WAY!!!” But in fact it was WAY, and I my ball was about 6 inches from the hole. I putted it in for my first par and I was pretty pumped up.

I also went unicefing last night, which was a nice experience. We raised like $150 dollars which was pretty crazy since we only had a little box to put it all in. I liked when some of the people were all pissed off at us. I mean I understand why they would be pissed. They just spent all this money on candy and now some jerk is asking them for more money. Some people were pretty generous and some people were tighter than a fat man’s grip on his hotdog. That’s about all I can remember, all these pills I’m taking kinda make things hazy.

-kevin

2003-10-29T22:19:00.000-08:00

You know how I kinda joke around with how gross the boy’s bathrooms are at school? Well, I can’t even joke about what I saw today. It was life changing. I will never be the same person. It all started in video class. I was standing around because I didn’t have to do anything. And then this guy walked into our class and told me that there was something horrible in the boy’s bathroom. He looked really disturbed so I asked him what was so horrible. When he told me I about shit my pants, which was funny since we were talking about bathrooms. Anyways, I was pretty stunned upon hearing just how horrible the bathroom was. Since I have become the bathroom grossness reporter I decided to go check it out for myself. I wanted to make sure it was true and all. So I left and headed towards the 200-hall bathroom. As I walked in it looked pretty normal. But I was expecting that since they guy said that the gross stuff was in the Handicapped stall. I cautiously walked toward the stall and almost threw up. Why did I almost throw up? Was there shit on the ground? Was there shit on the walls? NO THERE WASN’T! THERE WAS FUCKING BLOOD ON THE GROUND AND ON THE WALLS! BLOOD!!! Not to mention the blood that was on the toilet seat itself. I mean there was blood everywhere. It was the craziest thing I have ever seen. I can think of only two ways this could have been accomplished. Either some guy has ANAL TB or someone got murdered in there. After I looked at it for about five seconds I walked over to the principles office to tell them that there was BLOOD all over the bathroom. Unsurprisingly the person I told was very carefree about it and told some dude to go clean it up. How can you be carefree about BLOOD all over a freakin bathroom?!? I’m never going into that bathroom again, or at least I wont try to go in it. I hope the reason blood got everywhere was because some guy was beat up in there cause ANAL TB is too gross to think about.

-kevin

2003-10-28T22:06:00.000-08:00

THE MASSED TIMES
(a creation from the twisted mind of kevin gundred)

Are angles overrated? This was one of the questions that was brought up at a religious class in Kentucky. I was intrigued by this question and decided to do a story on it. I quickly scrounged up some money and bought an airline ticket. When I arrived in Kentucky, I checked into my motel and went out for a bite to eat. I chose a local restaurant called “If it ain’t kicken then were servin it.” The service was great and the food came quickly. The “Highway 90 special” as they called it was good, but it could have used more salt. After a fine meal I decided to go to the school where the angel question was brought up. Most of the students who went there thought that angels were nice enough. When I asked one girl what she thought about angels, she gave me an interesting answer: “ I like angles, they always help me. I remember this one time when I forgot to study for a test. When I got in the classroom I just sat down at my desk and stared at the exam. Then all of the sudden I started speaking funny and my test caught on fire and flew at the teacher. I was excused for the rest of the day and got an A+ on the test. I know angels were helping me that day. Since then I have always burned things before I go to bed to show the angles my respect for them.” After hearing this I told the student that she sounded more like she was being possessed rather than being helped by angels. The girl did a very funny thing when she heard me say this. She suddenly started to talk in weird tongues, next her eyes exploded and her hair caught on fire. She then started running around and ran into a wall. At the same time she hit the wall there was a huge explosion in the school’s parking lot. I quickly ran to the parking lot to see what had happened. I saw that my rental car had exploded. The frame and various parts of the car were still on fire. I took this as a message and decided to go home. If you have opinions on this matter go to http://www.whyareanglessuchabigdeal.com

-the massed times

2003-10-27T19:26:00.000-08:00

Man, sometimes my car’s air-conditioning smells like a sweaty fat guy who is dying. Not all the time but every once in awhile it almost kills me. I’ll just be driving along and then all the sudden the smell starts to tickle my nose. Next I try to hold my breath for as long as I can to keep from having to smell it. After awhile I run out of breathe and have to take a big old gulp of air. Besides air, I also take a big old gulp of sweaty fat guy smell, which makes me throw up in my mind. I only throw up in my mind because if I actually threw up I would get my car all dirty. Then I would probably throw up again since I would be driving while covered in throw up.

Turns out I’m gonna have a very small part in the broadcast. I just say a certain word a couple of times and then get punched. Tomorrow I get to go film volleyball with Chris down in the cuts, or at least down in San Leandro. I wonder how good San Leandro’s volleyball team will be. Probably not as good as ours, out team is hecka good. They can slap that ball pretty hard.

I found out that my dog’s favorite food is Caesar Salad. That’s pretty weird but then it’s hella cool too. I gave him two plates, one was all this meat and bones and the other was a bowl full of Caesar Salad. He looked at both of them and then sniffed the meat plate and he looked like he was about to chomp it up but instead he went after the Salad like a mad dog. After he was done with the salad he looked up for more. Since I didn’t’ have any more he started to eat the meat. What a dumb dog. At least his arteries aren’t clogged with bile and fat sludge. I guess he takes after his owner.

-kevin

2003-10-26T18:43:00.000-08:00

Tonight is an end to a great weekend. I don’t know about your weekend but mine was pretty sick. It started off on Friday by not going to any Homecoming events. I guess school spirit still hasn’t found me yet. Speaking of school, the next broadcast is gonna be this Thursday I think. I’m sad to say that I’m not gonna be in this broadcast since I completed my requirements in the last broadcast. I don’t know how good or how funny it’s gonna be but I don’t think its going to be bad. Anyway back to my weekend, on Saturday I had the house to myself since my parents were at some reunion thing. I didn’t do much though since I didn’t have any homework. Just mostly watched TV and ate stuff. Around 5:00pm my fun started. I went to the little Chabot School Halloween thing and it was pretty savage. I didn’t have to do anything and most of the time I ate nachos and chilled with my homies. Some notable things I did there were:
1) Dunked on their basketball hoops (there weren’t small or nothing).
2) Killed a really big fake spider.
3) Passed my first year of Hogwarts.
4) Wore a cool hat.
5) Took a handful of candy when I was only supposed to take one piece.
6) Got in touch with my “white” people radar (inside joke, I’m not racist).
7) Made fun of people who were pretending to be Harry Potter.

After the Chabot thing I went to dinner and then went to Chris’ house. Spent the night and then went to an automobile museum. Got my mom mad because I got home later than 3:00 in the pm. Finished all my chores except one. I’m gonna do that chore after I’m done writing this mofo. I guess that was my weekend. I shortened it up a bit. Much more happened than all that but I’m gonna keep that stuff on the down low. If I didn’t, I might get sued.

-kevin

2003-10-22T19:17:00.000-07:00

I have got another bathroom horror story for you today. You see I was coming down the stairs in 700 hall when I saw Dan. Dan had an odd look on his face and it didn’t look like a good odd face. When I got nearer to him he said,” Kevin! There is shit on the floor in the bathroom!” Since I bring you the news about nasty bathrooms at our school I thought I was obliged to go and check it out. When I got into the bathroom I got more than I expected. Not only was there shit on the floor, but there were shit footprints all over the place. How they hell did that happen? Did someone, lets use old Jimmy as an example again, miss the toilet and then just walk in it? Imagine that. I mean once Jimmy missed the whole freaking toilet he must have been pretty embarrassed. He was probably thinking of getting the hell out of there so no one would know he did it. He must have stepped on his own shit at some point during his escape route. He must have felt like the stupidest kid in the world when that happened. I myself am starting to think that Jimmy IS the stupidest kid in the world. After he stepped in his own fesses he must have thought his reputation was shot. But I guess he somehow managed to wipe the shit off his shoes and get the hell out of there without being seen by anyone. Cause if someone did see him, I would know about it. Man, I want to kill Jimmy. He is turning my school into a shit-on-the-floor cesspool.

-kevin

2003-10-21T19:02:00.000-07:00

Today has been a pretty good day. It’s a Tuesday today so my school day went as follows: Choir, Choir, Pre-cal. That is a pretty awesome day. Although we did have a quiz in pre-cal today, it wasn’t that hard and because of the quiz we didn’t have to learn a new lesson. But during school I wasn’t thinking much about school anyway. I was thinking mostly about going golfing for the first time. Now I don’t mean my first time hitting a ball or anything, I mean my first time on a course. It was pretty sick and I can’t wait to do it again. It only cost me five bucks too! Man, I’m gonna blow all my money hella fast on golfing. I mean you gotta get some balls, get gas to drive to the course, pay to play on the course, pay for dinner afterwards, and then pay some guy to do your homework. Boy do I gotta work on my short game, along with everything else.

Boy do I got a big test in Spanish tomorrow. I’m going to have to study like a madman. Too bad it’s already 6:50pm. I guess I’ll do must of my studying tomorrow during tutorial. Learning another language sucks the biggest one. Unless you learn it when your hella young, then it’s easy fo-sheezy. Gonna eat some hamburgers tonight. Nothing like eating heart attacks. I’m sure my heart thanks me for eating all this greasy fatty food. I’m giving all my vessels a nice smooth and slimy coating. Nothings going to get clogged up in them. It’s hard to be funny about something that might kill you when your 40. But it isn’t gonna get me. I’m gonna start eating healthy tomorrow. Heh, I remember when I went vegetarian my freshman year. That lasted for about two days. What can I say, flesh tastes pretty good.

-kevin

2003-10-20T18:05:00.000-07:00

Well, as I mentioned before, I rode my unicycle in the Junior march today. I didn’t really do much though. I mean I only rode it for a couple of minutes and then when the marchers reached the stage I just chilled behind them. I guess I did something right though cause Eugene was like,” Ya man! The judges saw you!” I guess that’s good then. I also found out something new today when I was participating in the march. You know how when each class yells a song to the judges or something you can’t understand them? Well I always thought you couldn’t understand them cause you were faraway. But I couldn’t understand a thing today and I was standing WITH them. I think only three people knew what the hell they were saying and the rest were just screaming random words. On another note, I wish I knew what it was like to have school spirit. Then maybe I could understand why people paint their faces blue and stuff.

Math quiz tomorrow but no fret. It’s only on the last two sections of chapter three. We learned the first lesson of chapter four today; it was pretty easy. So far must of this junk in pre-cal is all review. I wonder when the hell we will start on the new stuff. Not saying I want to start new stuff or anything, reviewing is pretty tight. Going golfing with Chris and my dad tomorrow and that’s gonna be sick. Sick as in fun, not sick as in me and my not being able to blow out all the candles. I’m getting tired of having to remember to take all my medicines at different times. Maybe if I just take all the medicine I have left right now, I will get better instantly. I mean think about it. If two pills a day get me sort of better, twenty pills have got to get me HELLA better. I guess we will find out tomorrow.

-kevin

2003-10-19T19:55:00.000-07:00

This weekend has been pretty sick. Actually it hasn’t been that cool. I didn’t really do anything yesterday except write my English paper. Today I went out to the driving range with Chris. Now I have only been golfing for a couple of months, but I seem to be doing ok. I was hitting my irons nice and straight but Chris’ shots seemed to zoom by mine like they were being shot from a canon. So I asked him if he would tell me about my swing. So I hit a ball and his response was,” SLOW THE FUCK DOWN!!!” Minus the swear word, explanation points, and capitals. He showed me some stuff and woohoo did it make a difference. I almost hit the ball out of the driving range with my 3-wood. That was awesome because I usually slice that baby so much people thing I work at a pizza place. He told me some other stuff too that I’m gonna practice like crazy until they are stored in my muscle memory. So I’d like to say a big thanks to Chris again for showing me some pointers.

I also helped clean up the Ocean today. Ya, it turns out I’m a big environmentalists. Wanna know what I did? Sure you do. I washed my car. I made sure all my soapy water found its way to the storm drain too. Now, thanks to me, all those fish can get a good cleaning when they swallow all that soapy water. Their gills will look super clean. Probably even give them a couple more years on their life span. Man, I’m such a great guy. Maybe I should campaign to become the Environmental Awareness President next year.

It turns out that people remember I can ride a unicycle. I was called by Eugene about an hour ago and he told me to bring my unicycle tomorrow so I can ride it during the Junior march. I haven’t ridden that thing in a while. Well actually I just rode it to see if I could still do it, but in general, not for a while. Maybe I’ll go ride it some more, I used to be able to do crazy stuff on that thing. Man, why do I always have to be good at stuff like bowling and riding unicycles?

-kevin

2003-10-17T19:31:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I went to the doctor for the third time. The first thing I did when I got there was take a breathing test. For whatever reason when you take a breathing test your main goal is to blow out all the candles on the computer screen. I guess the program thinks that if you think you are blowing out candles then you will do a better test. Anyways, the nurse said to go so I exhaled like a madman. When I was done the nurse looked to me and said,” There are still some candles left honey.” She said it in this really sad and worried voice. It made me feel bad on the inside. Then I went and saw the doctor. Even though I didn’t blow out all the candles I guess I’m still improving. The doc said to keep taking all my medications and to watch out for nose bleeds. My next appointment with him is in a couple of weeks.

Today we got the results for pops concert. I got some dudes part. In the script he doesn’t have a solo. But, I guess I made such an impression on the directors of pops, that they gave my character a solo anyway. They are finding the song I’ll sing right now so I don’t really now what I will be singing. That’s ok though, pops isn’t until February or something.

I’ve been hearing about people being all stressed out cause of work and school and it makes me feel bad. School barely affects me. I go to it and then I go home. I start my homework at like 7:00pm and am done usually before 8:30pm. Then I go to bed around 10:30pm. I don’t even have US History this year (took it in summer school), and I have two periods of choir. I have all stupid kid classes except pre-cal. I have only really studied for pre-cal tests too. Every other class I don’t study for and still get A’s on the tests. Maybe I should write a book on how to cruise through school and still be worth 20 million by the time you are 50. Right now I gotta cruise on over to the TV and watch some junk. Cruising rules.

-kevin

2003-10-13T18:38:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I went to San Francisco. It turned out to be pretty fun and I saw a lot of stuff. When I first got there I took like two steps and then some homeless guy asked me for some change. Then I thought, oh right, I’m in San Francisco. I hate being in places where there are lots of homeless people. It makes me feel so bad. I want to help them but it is like what can you do? One guy just kept muttering that he only needed a dollar and he seriously looked like he was about to die or something. I didn’t have anything but a ten so I couldn’t give anything to anybody. I’m glad I saw some funny homeless guys cause if I didn’t the whole trip would have been too depressing. The first funny guy I saw had a sign that said “Why lie? I need money for beer and food.” That was pretty funny. I wonder if he gets a lot of money with a sign like that. You know how there are those guys who are all spray-painted and they act like robots? Well, there was this one homeless guy, who was just a homeless guy, and he was acting like them. He was standing on like a milk carton and he had his face frozen in a real funny expression. Then some kids came up to give him some money and tried to do the robot. Each time he would move he would make this robot sound with his mouth. It was hella funny. He looked like he was having hella fun too. The last guy was just some dude sitting by himself on this flowerbed. He had his little cup out but nobody was giving him any change. So then he sat up and shouted ,” Look, I aint sitting here just to look PRETTY!!!” Man I almost fell over laughing after that one. He kept screaming after that but I couldn’t hear him. Oh also, when I was taking Bart over to San Francisco there were these two little kids singing the “He has got the whole world in his hands” song. They were making up all these crazy verses until finally they started singing,” He’s got all the young bloods in his hands, he’s got all the young bloods in his hands, he’s got all the young bloods in his hands, he’s got the whole world in his hands.” These kids were like five-year olds and the all the people started to laugh after that one. Then the little kids started to rap and that was pretty funny too. That’s about all that happened in Frisco. I’m glad all those young bloods are in He’s hands, if not, they might get shot.

-kevin

2003-10-11T18:48:00.000-07:00

Last night I saw the movie “Kill Bill.” That movie was pretty sick. I don’t just mean sick as in cool when I say that. I also say sick as in disgusting. Man, I didn’t know there was that much blood in the human body. The whole movie is all sword fighting, except for this one part, and throughout the movie every part of the human body gets chopped off someone. I definitely recommend that every person see this movie. Unless of course you don’t like to see people’s legs getting chopped off, eyes getting pulled out, scalps getting cut off, lips getting bit off, and much, much more.
On Friday my Pre-cal class learned about derivatives. I was so confused when we learned them. I thought they were going to be hard but they turned out to be the easiest thing in the whole world of math. I love derivatives. They are almost fun to do. I think I might start a derivatives club but I probably wont.
Tomorrow my family and I are going to San Francisco. Gonna go see Ripley’s believe it or not. You see a couple of years ago my mom asked me if I had ever been there and I said no. I guess it took her awhile to make up her mind that we would go there but now I would rather go hang with my homies or something. Oh well, what could be more fun than seeing a guy who can fit three pool balls in his mouth? Or how about seeing the people who stick hooks in their backs and hang from cranes and stuff? Almost sounds like too much to handle. I wonder if anybody from Castro Valley High will ever be in there. Maybe the actual school could get in for having the most disgusting bathrooms ever. A couple days ago I went into a stall, cause I had to relieve my body of some excess fluids, and there was a log right on the toilet seat. No joke. There was a freaking whole piece of shit just sitting there stinking. I don’t even know how a guy could do that. Maybe the dude, lets call him Jimmy, was too afraid to sit on the toilet seat because he was too afraid of getting infected by toilet diseases. So instead Jimmy tried to take a dumb standing up but only succeeded in plopping it right on the toilet itself. This brings up anther question. Why the hell would you just leave it there? I don’t know I guess Jimmy was just to embarrassed. Jimmy should get suspended.

-Buck

2003-10-08T22:05:00.000-07:00

Today I got home and slept till 7:30 pm. You see I wasn’t feeling to grand today and I was really tired for some reason. I also had a headache the size of a big headache all day. When I woke up my mom took my temperature. Seems my body was cooking at a very warm 102.1 degrees. That was enough to convince my mom that I wouldn’t be going to school tomorrow. If I was still in elementary school missing a day would be fine, but since I’m in high school it isn’t that fine. Missing a day in high school is my worst nightmare. You miss all your classes and you get tons of make-up work. Missing pre-cal is probably the worst thing I can do right now. The chapter is starting to get really hard and I didn’t even get the last lesson. Plus I have Dr. Ahmed; he doesn’t offer much extra help. He usually isn’t even in his room at lunch and if he is the door is usually locked. I will also miss video class, which is a bummer. Tomorrow Matt is gonna have to edit our segment for the broadcast all by himself. Editing by yourself isn’t that fun and if I was there we could do it twice as fast cause two heads is always better than one. I can’t think that well right now so I’m gonna end this shindig.

-kevin

2003-10-07T17:33:00.000-07:00

i guess you can't do italics on this site or something. i bet you can figure out who is talking anyway.

-kevin

2003-10-07T17:31:00.000-07:00

A few days ago I heard about the incident that involved Siegfried, Roy and a tiger. It turns out during one of their shows, one of their tigers mauled Roy. Yes, the illusionist was attacked by his own tiger. This story intrigued me so I decided to investigate it myself. The following is an interview I did with an audience member who was at the said magic show when Roy was mauled. My questions will be in regular print while the audience member’s answers will be in italics.

Why were you going to the Siegfried and Roy show in the first place?

While, I heard that their show was great. My marriage is currently falling apart and I thought that going to the show would be the best way to rekindle it.

I’m sorry to hear about your marriage. Nevertheless, I will have to ask you to stay on topic. This interview is not about you failing marriage. At the beginning of the show did anything seem unusual?

Well, not really. I mean Roy was wiping his tiger for no reason and screaming, ” Is that how you like it? Huh??” But that didn’t seem too strange to me. There was this one lady there who was wearing a horrible dress. She had absolutely no fashion sense.

Once again, please stay on topic. When the first tricks were being performed, how were the tigers and lions behaving?

They seemed like nice tigers and lions to me. I mean they would disappear when they were asked to and reappear when they were asked to. This one tiger though, the one that later mauled Roy, made a small mistake and Roy got very angry about it. He kept yelling at it in its face and calling it the b-word. Can I say the b-word in this interview? Is it ok?

Yes, it is fine if you really must.

“BITCH!!! BITCH!!! Stupid little BITCH!!!” That is what Roy kept yelling at it. He also kicked the tiger the whole time and finally said,” You stupid tiger, I bet you can’t do anything right. You probably can’t even follow simple rules.” After that he started to beat the tiger with his microphone.

Did you find these actions odd in any way?

No, I always solve my problems by beating people up.

Very well, can you describe what happened next?

Well… next the tiger made this big roar and then bit Roy square on his hand. The tiger bit the hand that Roy was beating him with. I should have said that first. Then Roy got this weird look on his face and he started to scream. Siegfried also got a weird look on his face and he too started to scream. Siegfried tried to get the tiger off of Roy but he only made the tiger more made. The next thing that happened was…

Yes, what was next? Is it too horrifying to remember?

What?!? Oh, I was trying to remember what I have to get at the grocery store after we are done here. I think it was cheese, steak, ranch dressing, and… and…

Sorry to interrupt you but we are not talking about your grocery list. We are talking about what happened to Roy after the tiger bit his hand.

Oh yes, you see at first I thought it was all part of the show so I started to laugh. I mean I had never been to a Siegfried and Roy show so I didn’t know what to expect. But when the tiger dropped Roy’s hand and went for his neck, I began to think it wasn’t part of the show. I mean Roy was really bleeding like a madman and it just didn’t look fake.

What did you do when you discovered that it wasn’t part of the show?

Well then I started to laugh again. I haven’t seen anybody else get mauled before but it sure looked funny when it happened to that Roy character.

How was Siegfried reacting during all of this?

He looked pretty worried to me. Siegfried kept yelling something about how Roy couldn’t die because Roy was his soul mate. At that point the tiger started to drag Roy off the stage and it left this really big puddle of blood. I forgot to tell you about the blood. There was tons of it. It was squirting everywhere. The front two rows were the people getting sprayed the most. It reminded me of those shows where they have the front rows hold up a plastic sheet so they don’t get wet and stuff. You know what I’m talking about?

Yes I do, will you please continue.

Well, if they had a sheet like that a lot of those people’s clothes would have been saved. Anyways, after the tiger dragged Roy off the stage Siegfried did something really weird. It looked like he was trying to drink the puddle of Roy’s blood or something. Then he started to rub the blood all of his body while saying,” I’ll never forget you. How you felt. How you felt…” It was pretty weird. That was about the time I passed out. You see I am on six different medications right now and I seem to pass out a lot. I usually wake up in a different place too.

Well then, I guess our interview is over. Thanks for

Hotdog buns!!! That was the other thing I need at the store, hotdog buns.

I’m glad you remembered, here is the door, goodbye.

Ya, so there are the facts about the mauling dealy. I had a real fun time interviewing that audience member. Maybe I should become a reporter.

-kevin

2003-10-06T21:09:00.000-07:00

Today I helped train rescue dogs. Here is my story:
I left for the dog-training thing at 5:30 pm. My first objective was to find the “maintenance” road, which I was supposed to turn onto. I found it ok and when I turned on to it I was pretty psyched. It turned out to be this little curvy road going up a hill. Since I was wearing my new driving gloves, I decided to race up the hill like a madman. About halfway up I noticed that there was a cop behind me. So I slowed down like a maniac and hoped that he didn’t see me or that he wouldn’t give me a ticket or nothing. I kept going up the hill until I saw that there is like a huge police station/building next to the road. The cop pulled into it and that gave me a sigh of relief. I found where I was supposed to park so naturally I parked there. I was one of about three people there and I wondered where the hell everyone else was. I was only a couple minutes early. Then some Key Club Officer arrived and got all upset because she was the only officer there and that she didn’t have the sign-in sheet and stuff. It took about a thirty minutes for everyone to get there and the wait was pretty boring. When people finally did arrive some dude called four names, mine was included, and I became part of the Victor 2 group. The dude told us to go hike to this one spot and to hide in the trees. My group started to get going and I told them I would meet them there because I had something I needed in my car. I guess they weren’t that smart cause they waited, or maybe they were too scared to go on without someone like me. Anyway, I went to my car and got my chair, Chinese food, fork, and drink. When I walked back to my group they were all surprised and stuff. I thought you were supposed to bring crap like that. The rest of the night was spent waiting for dogs to come and find us. I sat in my chair and ate most of the time. The rest of my group was forced to sit in poison oak and stuff. Maybe next time they will bring a chair. After we were relieved there was cake and everybody had some. It was a pretty cool experience except that Nate told me that everyone makes-out during the whole thing. I don’t know about other groups, but mine didn’t make-out. Maybe next time.

-kevin

2003-10-05T13:01:00.000-07:00

Sorry for the long break in postings. I guess I haven’t had the time to write them or something. Nothing too exciting happened last week so you didn’t miss much. Something exciting did happen Friday night though. Around 10:30 pm. I got a call from Chad asking if I wanted to “do something” with him and Dan. I said sure and in about 10 minutes I could here Dan’s car rumbling outside of my house. So I got in the car, I sat in the passenger seat, and we took off. I asked what we were planning to do but they said they didn’t know. As we were driving along I noticed that they had some food in the car. I think it was chicken strips from McDonalds or something. So anyways, we were driving down Somerset and Dan starts eating some chicken or whatever. We get to the stoplight to turn onto Redwood road and it is red. So Dan pulls to a stop and keeps eating. When the light turns green Dan steps on the gas while he is still eating with both hands. About halfway into the intersection Dan yells,” Kevin! Why aren’t you turning?” I was like what the hell? But since we were about to crash I grabbed the wheel with my left hand and turned it. I guess Dan was hungry cause I drove all the way to and around Columbia. I don’t know if you have ever driven while you are in the passenger seat and while the driver is looking down at his hands while eating chicken, but it is hella fun. It was kinda scary when Dan wasn’t looking and just pushing on pedals, but besides that it was pretty savage. We thought if we got pulled over by Cops we would tell them that Dan lost his hands in the war, and that I lost my feet in the war, so that this was the only way we could drive. I don’t know if the Cops would buy that but maybe, some Cops are just stupid. I have been taking my six medications for about a week and so far I have improved. I went to the Doctor’s on Friday and the nurse said I was still “crappy.” I hope I’m not “crappy” for much longer, I don’t think it’s helping me with the ladies.

-kevin

2003-09-30T20:47:00.000-07:00

For those of you who have been around me the past couple of weeks you might have noticed that I have had a cough. A pretty nasty, gross, and horrible sounding cough. Well, while I was on the Madrigals retreat I promised someone that I would go see a doctor. So that is what I did today. I went to see the doctor. Guess what I found out? I am FUCKED UP. I get into his office and he does these little tests where he listens to my breathing with the instrument that is always cold when they put it on your chest. After a couple of breaths he tells me I should go take a breathing test. He said some doctor mumbo-jumbo and this is basically what I think it meant: “Damn, you lungs be full of shit. I can’t here a damn thing with all that rumbling going on down there. I need you to go breath into some machine so I can figure just how fucked up you are.” So I went to do the breath test or whatever and I got a low “score.” It said I might have “breathing problems” or something. Next the doctor gave me this thing that was supposed to open up my air passageways and junk. It took seven minutes of having this huge tube in my mouth and it sucked. The whole time I had the tube in my mouth a nurse explained how to use all the medicine I was about to get. After that he told me some more stuff and then sent me down to the pharmacy to get the medicine he prescribed me. It turns out I need six different drugs to make me normal again. Yup, that’s right six. The bill was like $93.36 or something but because of my coverage we only had to pay $50. I am taking so much stuff it’s not even funny. I’m taking one thing that will open up my nasal passage so that this other medicine will work. I’m also taking two different inhalers in a certain sequence that will give one of them a “boost.” So if you talk to me tomorrow and I don’t know who I am, you will know why.

-kevin

2003-09-29T19:54:00.000-07:00

Guess what movie I saw today? CABIN FEVER. Did I think it was good? The special effects were good. Was it scary? No, it was kinda funny and it didn’t make any sense. The basic plot is that there is this weirdass disease going around and kids on a vacation catch it. Let me explain the symptoms for you. First off, your skin starts to peel off in huge amounts. I mean it’s fucking nasty. It looked like their skin was decomposing or something. Second, you bleed everywhere and throw-up blood like you are a supermodel puking before a show or something. I didn’t know you body had that much blood in it. This one dude pukes blood and it covers an entire car!!! As I said before the whole movie doesn’t make sense and nothing is ever explained. There were only a few things that were worth sitting through the whole movie for. For guys, you see a couple sex scenes and a couple chest shots. For girls, you see a couple sex scenes and that is pretty much it. You girls should protest that movies these days don’t have equal amounts of nude scenes between men and women. Actually you shouldn’t. There is also a part where there is a guy in a full bunny suit. Why the hell is there a guy in a full bunny suit? I don’t know, the movie never explains it. Bottom line, you should go see this movie because its pretty funny, or, you shouldn’t go see this movie because it makes no sense and isn’t scary at all. The first half of the movie is actually pretty good and scary. Then it is like the director died or something and some complete idiot got to direct the rest of the movie.

If anybody has to name a new dog, name him or her Dr. Mambo. The killer dog in CABIN FEVER is named that and he eats a couple people. I wish I could have named my dog that.

-kevin

2003-09-27T20:07:00.000-07:00

Well I just got back from the Madrigal retreat thing about an hour ago and I thought I would write about it. It was pretty fun and some cool stuff happened. The main thing I want to talk about is the ropes course though. We did two “elements” and the first one was pretty sick. Some dude called it the leap of faith or something. He said that you have to climb up this tree and then when you get to the top you have to jump and try to grab onto this trapeze thing. I thought that it sounded pretty fun and I was only a little scared. When we actually got to the “tree” I almost threw-up on this one kid. The tree turned out to be 35 feet tall and about a foot in diameter. It had these staple things that you were supposed to use to climb up it and at the top there was a little platform that was two inches bigger than the tree. The trapeze act was at least five feet away from the tree and didn’t look like it would be that easy to jump to. The first person to try it was this girl who was really afraid of heights. She started to climb it and got to the top of the foot pegs after some time. The next thing she had to do was to let go of the tree and step up onto the platform. This turned out to be the hardest thing to do. You had to let go, as I mentioned before, balance yourself on one leg, and step up onto this little ass platform. Anyways, after a long pause she stepped onto the platform and then we all found out that trees a foot in diameter shake like chicken-shits. Soon the shaking was out of control and she fell and her turn was over. If you didn’t guess all ready we were wearing harnesses during all of this. Three more girls went and some of them jumped for the trapeze act but no one was able to grab a hold. Then the guy is like,” Who is next?” So then everyone said go Kevin go, so I went. I am not that fond of heights. But, when I have a harness on I realize something. You can’t fall!!! I guess other people have a hard time grasping that concept. So I start to climb and it takes longer than I thought to reach the top but soon enough I was there and I was faced with the challenge of getting up onto the platform. I tried and almost fell but I regained my balance and then collected myself. I thought it out a little more and then tried again. I don’t remember exactly what I did but I ended up standing and everyone cheered. I forgot to tell you that once you got up onto the platform you had to turn to the left to face the trapeze act. So I looked down from the top of the platform and I thought,” Holy shit, I am fucking high.” Or at least something close to that. I turned towards the trapeze and then I became really calm for some reason. I kinda did this spider-man crouch thing and then jumped for the trapeze. I grabbed it like a savage and everyone cheered. Woohoo I rock. I did some funny poses, like letting go with one hand and making a thumbs up sign cause all these people were taking pictures. So after the pictures were taken and the cheers were yelled I let go and was let down. When I reached the bottom I got some high fives and the rope dude said that he had never seen anybody pose from the trapeze act. I told him that I only did it cause I was such a savage and he got this constipated look on his face. After me only four kids out of 30+ got a hold of the trapeze deal. For some reason they were all guys. Maybe the five of us made it to the trapeze with the help of our bojangles or something. Wow it looks like I have written a lot. I will write some more stuff about it tomorrow, maybe. Right now I gotta go jump off of my roof and try to grab a hold of the telephone wires.

-kevin

2003-09-25T18:40:00.000-07:00

I am 36 years old. I was just in an earthquake. Severe burns cover my right arm and right chest. I am in pain so intense I can’t think without blacking out. Or at least I was that person at Eden Hospital today. It was pretty cool. When we got there we were told what was wrong with us and everything. Chris had glass fragments in his face. It was pretty nasty. Then we were sent to the Emergency Room. We were supposed to be screaming and stuff but I couldn’t. I was having too much fun watching other people. Chris was holding his face and screaming. He was also trying to pick out the pieces of glass with his hands. This one girl was screaming about her baby or something. It was pretty cool. When the nurse lady asked me why I wasn’t yelling I said that I had been working on my meditation techniques and that I was using them to control the pain. She gave me morphine anyway though. Man, that stuff makes you itchy.

Tomorrow at lunch I’m leaving for a retreat with the Madrigals. We are going to some weird camp in Santa Cruz that has a rope course. That is hecka sick. If you ever watch Road Rules or whatever, the course they climb in harnesses way up in tress and junk is a rope course. I can’t wait to see the people who can’t do it cause they are afraid. I have never seen a person who isn’t able to go “one step further” because they are all freaking out and junk. But, since this is supposed to bring the Madrigals closer together as a group, maybe that isn’t the best thing to think. Oh well. By the way, since I’m gonna be leaving tomorrow I wont be able to write anything for Friday night since its an overnight dealee. Did I mention that it is coed? I am going to have some funny stories when I get back.

Woohooo!!! If you haven’t noticed the little counter at the top of this page has reached one thousand and is still going. Thanks to all the people who come here and read what I got to say. Right now I gotta go pack for the retreat. If anything terribly funny happens, like lets say a person on the rope course is hecka stressing out and then he or she falls and gets mentally messed up for the rest of their lives, I might just have to write about it.

-kevin

2003-09-24T17:58:00.000-07:00

Today was a pretty good day. You will find out why in a couple of sentences. I thought that today I would talk a little about bowling. For those of you who don’t know, I bowl and am pretty good at it. I bowl in the retired teachers league at the Castro Bowl. Retired Teachers? Yes, I do bowl with retired teachers. There a pretty cool bunch once you get to know them. Anyways, today I bowled my new high game. It was one pin higher than my old high game. Is the suspense killing you yet? If it is you will be glad to know that I bowled a 258 today. I had 7 strikes in a row and 8 strikes all together. That was pretty cool and I can’t wait to break that high game as well. The only bad thing about being pretty good at bowling is that you are pretty good at bowling. I mean who really cares? I don’t have a varsity jacket for it or anything. Girls don’t call me just cause I can get a strike every once in awhile. I have never been at the bowling alley before and had a girl come up to me to tell me I’m awesome and to give me her number. Well actually that did happen. Except it was with this like 26-year-old asian chick. I think she was a little drunk that night too. She was pretty cool though, but I think she was a little old. Not saying I don’t like older chicks. Well I guess I wouldn’t like really older chicks, but if you still look good and can still feed yourself, give me a ring.

By the way the live journal thing isn’t gonna be for a while so keep coming here for your daily laugh.

-kevin

2003-09-23T20:52:00.000-07:00

Today I overdosed on drugs. At least in a movie I did. You see I was really feeling down, my partner was dead, I couldn’t kill any more Bloods, and I didn’t have any addicts to sell drugs to. It sucked. So I just took the drugs I was selling and overdosed. It was a pretty cool shot. Oh, about that Spanish test I was dreading a while ago, I got a hundred percent on it. Guess I was fretting over nothing. This Thursday I get to be in a disaster. It’s to help train people at a hospital or something. I wonder if I will be dead, have a head wound, or maybe have a cut on the old finger. Either would be a horrible disaster to mankind. I think whatever I get I’m gonna hella “role-play” with it. If I’m dead I’m gonna act so dead they will freak out and check my pulse every five minutes. If I got a head wound I’m gonna yell like a banshee for some snack food. I’ll say,” I want some food!!! I’m gonna die, I can see my brain.” I’m sure that people with big head wounds say crazy stuff like that. I hope that freaks those hospital people out. Give them a little pressure you know.

I’m not going to college man. Yup, Chad, Dan, and I are going into Real Estate together. So while you are at college having the time of you lives we will be getting our licenses. Sure you will be getting drunk all the time and going to all night long parties, but hey will be making some money. I mean of course you will be living in dorms and you will be free from your parents… Shit, maybe I do wanna go to college. Wait, I know. Chad, Dan, and me will just be roommates in this big house. Then we will be the ones with the house that the all-night-long-parties take place at. Sick, college is for losers. Go real estate.

By the way, I guess I’m gonna drop this blog and start a live journal. I guess you can have pictures on that one and you guys could also send replies and stuff. I guess I’ll start it up with like a “best of kevin’s blogs” deal. That should be sick.

-kevin

2003-09-21T17:21:00.000-07:00

Today was a pretty good day. But I would first like to talk about yesterday. Around 1 or 2 or 3 in the afternoon I went over to Chad’s house. Dan and Jordan also showed up. There we decided to make a movie. We made it on the dealings of the Bloods and the Crips. Those are two gangs if you didn’t know. At one point Jordan is this drug addict and Chad deals him some cocaine. Then the camera goes over to Chad and Dan and then it pans back over to Jordan. The next shot has Jordan’s whole face covered in the cocaine and there was even some in his hair too. That was pretty funny. After we were all done filming it was pretty late. Chad, Dan, and I decided that we should spend the night at Chad’s house since we were all going to the Key Club thing today. Turns out I talk a little in my sleep. According to Chad and Dan at some point in the night I yelled out of nowhere,” THAT WASN’T THE LAST ONE, WAS IT?” I guess I said that same line two more times before saying a very disappointed sounding,” That doesn’t make any sense.” Ya, I guess that is pretty strange.

Today most of my day consisted of a pancake breakfast at the Senior Center on Redwood road. It was my first Key Club experience and it went pretty well. The food was good, until the eggs started to turn green. I don’t the seniors minded much though, I don’t think they see very well or taste very well anymore. I probably had the most fun throwing huge balls around with Dan and other little kids in the “Children’s Games Room.” When the event actually ended I stuck around cause Chad was still cleaning dishes. I helped him clean some and I brought in some mats for the kitchen. Chad and me were almost the last people there, besides Tim, Lana, and this other lady. After that I came home and found a recipe from Peru. I got make it for Spanish Class. Man what a crazy assignment. What the hell does Peru have to do with anything Spanish?

2003-09-19T18:22:00.000-07:00

Well I guess I was wrong about the whole Spanish test and everything. That little test was easier than pie and I slapped it in the face. Today is Friday, which is usually my day to do nothing. Maybe this Friday I will do something. Just for the heck of it. Tomorrow I’m going to a skateboarding competition so that will be fun. I haven’t skated in awhile myself, due to the fact that the weather right now melts my skin, but it should be hellla sick.

I heard that in airports now they have an x-ray machine that you walk through. It can see through your clothes and stuff. It’s supposed to help the airport people see what you are carrying or hiding I guess. I thought it was pretty funny how the article said that the x-ray device can see your private parts. I guess you have to be 18 or older to man that machine. Now all you have to do if you are a girl and you want to know what some guy has got underneath them pants, is to take him to the airport. Then when he walks through the x-ray you can peek over the counter to the x-ray machine screen. I guess that would be kinda hard to do though. I mean, you don’t usually go to a random airport to walk through the x-ray machines. But I’m sure you girls can think of something to get your man to walk through the all seeing, future of the relationship determining machine.

The recall is coming closer and closer. It looks like Arnold aint gonna win though. That’s too bad, this state needed a steroid filled punch to the neck. My bet is that Davis is gonna get re-elected. That’s all I got for today. If any of you men lacking in your packing go to the airport soon, you will now know why the lady checking your possessions has a smile on her face.

2003-09-18T19:48:00.000-07:00

Tomorrow I have a test in Spanish on all the stuff we were supposed to cover last year. The only problem is that my teacher was a piece of crap and didn’t teach my class shit. I mean sure I got an A and all but I don’t know what the fuck is going on in the class I’m in now. Whenever my teacher talks I don’t understand shit (usually) and I feel dumb. Then I look around and see that everyone else, except this one dude, doesn’t know shit either. That makes me feel better; at least we will all fail together. I am so fucking scared. I was just doing some studying for the test, but it doesn’t help much. Wanna know why? Cause you can’t make a whole damn year in one night!!! So hopefully I’ll be a lucky guesser tomorrow or something so I’ll get at least a B. Gosh, I hope I don’t have to go back to like 1-2, I don’t think I could handle that. I would feel like a dumbass.

On a lighter note, I made another blanket for a needy child. You see in choir right now if you’re sick you gotta do the blanket thing. Besides that not much has happened. I don’t have a funny topic today cause I’m too stressed out about the Spanish thing. Guess I’ll write about something funny tomorrow, or on how good or bad I do on the test.

2003-09-16T20:09:00.000-07:00

Today my day wasn’t that exciting. I did help make a blanket for a needy child though. Since my day was only filled with air I thought I would talk about today’s female pop stars. I thought it would be fun if talked about them from two different viewpoints. When your done reading them you can decide which one is my viewpoint. But, to make it more interesting I’m putting in the possibility that neither of them is my viewpoint. So here it goes.

Viewpoint one: The female pop stars of today are horrible. They wear hardly any clothes and only sing about sex. They have a new boyfriend everyday. He is always some guy with no shirt on. This is not a good example for children. In their videos they dance like they are trying to summon the devil. They also don’t wear enough clothes in their videos and they always have a bedroom scene. In public they wear pants so low I’m surprised you don’t see what they are hiding. The female pop star can be described in two words, skimpy and raunchy.

Viewpoint two: The female pop stars of today are great. They wear hardly any clothes and only sing about sex. They have a new boyfriend everyday. Maybe tomorrow it will be me. Or maybe it will be my friend and I can mooch off of him. They set a great example for young girls. They teach them to grow up to become loose women who only wear thongs. In their videos the way they dance summons up my “devil.” I like to turn the TV on mute and just watch them shake what their mama gave them. I make sure to see every new video just so I can see the bedroom scene. In public they wear pants so low I’m surprised you don’t see what they are hiding. They should try to wear them lower. The female pop star can be described in two words, skimpy and raunchy. Those are two fantastic words.

So is one of those my viewpoint? Or are neither of them my viewpoint? That’s the question.

-kevin

2003-09-15T19:09:00.000-07:00

Today I thought I would talk about swearing. It seems that everyone today swears. In order for this topic to work I must also swear as I write this. So don’t take it personally, take it generally. First question I wanted to answer was where swear words came from. Who said they were bad and why did they have the power to make that decision. So I went online to research it when I thought what the fuck am I doing? I don’t give a shit. So on to the next question: Have people always sworn as much as people sweat today? I think the answer is yes. My dad swears all the time and he is pretty old, so when he was a kid he must have sworn like a motherfucker. The next question was how many people swear today? This is easily answered. Everyone swears. Well, I guess not everyone, I mean I know that Ian is laughing at me for two reasons right now, but in reality a huge majority of bastards swear like dumbfucks. Swearing is everywhere, it’s in our music, on TV, and all our friends do it. The last question is: Is swearing a bad thing? I guess this depends on the person. I don’t think that much of it because it’s just a word. Other people think it is really bad and that if you do it too much bad things will happen to you. But hey, 50-cent swears all the time and he doesn’t seem to be in any bad places. So I guess you yourself have to answer the last question. Now I gotta go watch some sonuvabitches play golf on TV.

-kevin

2003-09-14T19:54:00.000-07:00

Today I went to the little “fair” in the village. My partners in crime were Dan and Chad. We met in the bowling alley and then decided to go look at the fair. The second tent we went by had a sign that said if you could make a basket in this little hoop thing you would win a prize. I was like,” This is sweet, I could make that basket if I was Michael Jordan.” So I go up to the guy and I said that I wanted to take a shot at it. Then the dude said,” No, that’s only for the little kids.” At this point I looked up at the tent to see just what this place was for. It turned out to be for some kind of church. Just as this is registering in my mind the guy said to us,” Hey guys, come here for second.” We didn’t go near him so he told us he didn’t bite. So then he looked at us and said,” I got to ask you guys a question.” Then he looked at us some more. He just kept looking at us and I got so annoyed that I was gonna remind him that he told us he was gonna ask us something. Then he finally said,” This is pretty deep.” After another long pause he looked straight at Dan and said,” Do you believe in God?” Dan was like,” uh.. I guess, um… Ya.” Then he started to talk to us about God and stuff. He kept looking at Dan and I could barely stop myself from laughing because Dan just kept nodding like a freak. That was funny. So then he gave us some pamphlets and told us to go think about what he had just told us. So then we left.

We were walking for a while and then I saw the hermit crab booth. It’s one of those booths where you throw the balls in the little fishbowls, you know the deal. I bought some balls and started throwing them. No luck. Then I remembered that I have long arms. So I waited until the fishbowl lady wasn’t looking and plopped one right into one of the fishbowls. I told her I made one in. She gave me a real dirty look and it made me smile. Anyways, I got a hermit crab now. I went and bought him all his little hermit crab junk and now he is sitting up in my room. I don’t have a name for him so I’m asking you for one. Either email me at thegundred@elvis.com or tell me at school. Only the best name will be chosen but bribes wouldn’t hurt either. So think up some names while I think about this little pamphlet I got in my pocket.

-kevin

2003-09-12T19:58:00.000-07:00

Man, it’s hard to write about my day. Wanna know why? Cause nothing ever happens. All my classes are easy and I got nothing to complain about. I guess I could complain about not being able to complain, but that would be stupid. The only interesting thing that happened in school today was that my English teacher told us about his new drum set. I guess he is supposed to be pretty good or something. Besides that nothing happened. Oh wait; there was some shitty fight today at school. Has there ever been a good fight at school? No, there hasn’t. I guess I will write about fights.

Basically at Castro Valley High School you got two types of fights. One is where one guy gets the shit beat out of him and the other is when to “ghetto” kids look at each other funny. The first usually happens between an upper classmen and a lower classmen. For example, last year some freshman got the shit beat out of him by some sophomore. I mean this guy’s shit was really out. He got punched in the face like five times and then he got smashed into a picnic table. I later found out that the little freshman said he wanted to do some dudes sister. I guess he did humping motions in the air or something to really piss off the chic’s brother. Not a smart move when you dealing with a “I’m gonna punch you in the face five times and then smash you into a picnic table” kinda guy. But I guess that some people are just stupid and that some people just like to beat em’ up.

The second type of fight is the stand around and beat your chest fight. This type of fight usually occurs between two “ghetto” kids. One “ghetto” kid is usually like,” Damn loser, I’m gonna bitch slap you so hard your face will be red.” And then the other “ghetto” kid is like,” What did you say motherfucker? Don’t make me beat your ass.” Usually what follows after this is a whole bunch of people run to where the “fight” is. Then they two “ghetto” kids look at each other and keep swearing. Sometimes they even get close enough to hit each other, but they usually backup at that point. Then you know one guy is like,” No man, it aint worth it. I deal with you later.” And then the other guy shakes his head and they walk off. Then the crowd thins out and everybody leaves. If I were a campus guard I wouldn’t even bother with those types of fights. I would just click off my walmart style walkie-talkie and take a couple swigs from my secret beer bottle. Till next time ni@@a, I know this wasn’t the greatest entry but if you say anything I’ll bitch slap you so hard you will need a haircut by the time you wakeup.

-kevin

2003-09-11T21:43:00.000-07:00

Looks like I forgot to say I joined video club. Guess what? I joined video club.

2003-09-11T21:20:00.000-07:00

Today was club day. Dan and I decided to attack the tables together. This is how our club joining lunch went. We first went to the M.E.S.A. table since we knew the girl working there. We wrote down our names and became the first members of M.E.S.A. At the same time this was happening we also became the first members of the “Poor Man’s Club.” We later found out that this was actually the Latin club and will have to talk about whether we will keep up our commitment. Next we walked over to the campus beautification table to ask them where the Key Club table was. The president of the club, Andrea, didn’t tell us where the Key Club table was and just kept asking us if we would join her club. Then we figured out that the clubs were in alphabetical order and we left. We found the Key Club booth and got our little papers our whatever. That’s about when Chris showed up and then him and I went on a quest to join clubs. I got him to sign up for M.E.S.A. so I could get some more candy and then we looked for other clubs that were giving out goodies. We found some Mexican club and signed up for that too. It was kind of a waste since I gave the candy I got from them to a girl later in the day. This was about the point when my whole group met up and signed up for campus beautification. That’s all I can remember, I hope I mentioned six clubs since that is how many I joined.

After school ended, I began another quest. A quest to capture the essence of girl’s volleyball. My partner in crime was once again Sean Ryan. He wanted to leave early thought since he wanted to do some “bowling” when he got home. When we walked into the gym we were reminded of something: Girls wear spandex when they play volleyball! I don’t know why this is but I’m not complaining. Maybe it gives them some advantage or something. Or maybe the guy who invented girl’s volleyball really invented it just to make up a sport where girls would wear spandex. If any girl has ever worn spandex I would like the answer to this question: Are you guys wearing underwear under that thing? If you are you guys sure fooled Sean and I. It’s too bad for the girls that guys don’t wear spandex in any sport. I guess girls would have to go to swim meets to get the same views that Sean and I got. Anyways, we videotaped the volleyball until the battery ran out. Then we left. My sister visited us today, which was kinda cool. We went to some Asian restaurant for dinner. The food was pretty good but I just don’t like anything that isn’t American for some reason. That’s all for now, maybe I’ll catch you in one of my six clubs.

-kevin

2003-09-10T21:19:00.000-07:00

todays post sucked, don't read it...

2003-09-10T18:58:00.000-07:00

Bo provided me with today’s topic. It is as follows: Spiky Hair. What the hell kind of a topic is spiky hair you ask? Well, it’s a good one. Or at least I think it is. I will know for sure after I’m done writing this. Lets start with the different types of spiky hair. First off I guess you just got spiky hair. It’s nothing to special and nothing to fancy. It's just a regular amount of hair that has been spiked. Another type of spiky hair is “crazy spiky hair.” Crazy spiky hair usually consists of huge spikes that reach a foot into the air. I know one kid at CV is sporting that look. Since I’m tired of explaining the different types of spiky hair just take the two I mentioned and fill in all the spaces between them.

Next I will explain the advantages of spiky hair. One major advantage is that it looks cool. When people see someone with spiky hair they think he or she is cool and up-beat. Spiky hair is also cool if you like anime. I don’t think I have ever seen an anime character without spiky hair. I don’t know how much gel they use in the morning but I’m sure it’s a lot. To be able to save the earth, fight pokemon, and go super saying without your hair ever losing its hold is a big feat. Another advantage to spiky hair is that it could save you life. For example, if someone was gonna kill everybody except people with spiky hair, you would be saved. Or if you were trapped and they only way you could get out was by breaking a very thin piece of paper with your spiky hair, once again you would owe your life to the spikiness. After writing all this crap about spiky hair, I suddenly have the urge to rinse out my hair and re-spike it. Maybe I’ll slit my wrists with the spikiness.

-kevin

2003-09-09T17:16:00.000-07:00

Today I was going to write about my day at school. Then after thinking about my day I realized that not much happened. I had choir, choir, and then pre-cal. This is probably the reason I like Mondays so much. My next video assignment is coming up in a few days. I’m gonna be filming, along with Sean Ryan, the JV girls volleyball match. I always get the sign-up sheet late and seem to get stuck with girl’s sports all the time. This isn’t all bad, but something like filming a dance would be a lot more fun. I don’t know who else is gonna be there but Sean and I usually think of stuff to do to pass the time. For example, when we filmed girl’s tennis Sean got hit in the bojangle with a tennis ball. That was pretty funny and caused laughter for everyone who was around us. Sean told me to think of some interview questions for the volleyball players. I don’t really know what to ask since I haven’t been to a game forever. If anybody has suggestions tell me the next time you see me.

If you guys have ever noticed the little counter at the top of the page, which counts how many times people visit my blog, it has reached over 500. I don’t know if this is much of a compliment but for only having this thing for two weeks, I think its pretty good.

For some reason I keep losing track of time. For example, it’s now about 5:00 and for some reason I think it has only been like ten minutes since I got home (I got home around 3:00). Well, seeing as I still got a lot of day left, I better go do something so it doesn’t flash before my eyes. I think I’ll go hit a couple of golf balls, or stay online and talk to people. Hard decision when you’re sitting in a comfy chair.

-kevin

2003-09-08T20:45:00.000-07:00

Bo contributed today’s topic. The topic is: “main goal in life: reproduction”. Some of you might laugh when you read this statement, others may be repulsed. But, if you really think about it, it isn’t that bad of a goal. I mean without reproduction me or you wouldn’t be alive. We would have just been a wasted gamete that had lived and died a very short life. Reproduction is the very essence of a species. Without it the species would go extinct. Another good reason for reproduction is its result. Of course I am talking about a new life. A new life that is your son or daughter. Because once you have a son or daughter, you become in control of them. You get to mold their lives and instill in it values that will help them to succeed in life. Or of course you can raise them like wild animals and see what their instincts lead them to do. Another possible way to raise them is to teach them nothing and never tell them to do their homework so they become stupid and have to spend the rest of their lives in a low paying job. Yes, being in control of someone’s life can be fun, evil, and awarding. That is what I will leave you with today. I think I’m gonna raise my kid to be a secret agent man. That would be sick.

-kevin

2003-09-07T21:02:00.000-07:00

Sorry about the last two days, I had to make this movie for my English class. It turned out pretty good and there were five deaths in it. I wonder how my English teacher is going to respond to that. After viewing it I noticed that it didn’t have much to do with our topic. Oh well, it has a sick shoot-out scene and five deaths, as I mentioned before. The filming of it was pretty basic. We got together the crew, which consisted of Chris, Matt, Dan, Jordan, Greg, Ben, Chad, and I. Everyone did a good job and had fun. I was sorry I couldn’t work in a lacrosse fight scene like Chad wanted. He was all set in his gear and ready to kill people. Chris’ sister gladly took the part of the 15 year old mother who gave birth to “Middle English.” Tomorrow Ben and I have to figure out a way to connect our movie to our project. I guess we should have thought it out more before we made it. Oh well, we will probably get an A+ anyway. If not, I’ll just send Chad over to kill my English teacher with his lacrosse stick.

-kevin

2003-09-04T21:34:00.000-07:00

Today I had a filming assignment from my advanced video class. I was supposed to film and capture key moments from the Girl’s Tennis games that occurred earlier today. This is my story.

As the last class ended I walked over to room 315. This is the video room and where I was supposed to meet my partner. As soon as I got there I saw the shaggy hair of my partner Sean Ryan. Then Sean and I waited for our video equipment from our teacher, Mr. J. As soon as we were loaded up we took off toward the courts. As we got closer to the tennis courts we started to see a group of people around them. My first guess was that these people were the tennis players we were here to film. When we finally reached the courts my guess was confirmed. Standing among us were two tennis teams, the first our own team and the other a different team that would later turn out to be the opponents. Trying to act like professionals, Sean and I went and introduced ourselves to the tennis coach. We told him what we were there to do and he told us what we could do. He said we could tape from a small corner inside the tennis courts. This turned out to be a bad spot to tape from. We were limited to a very small portion of the court we were watching and the angle looked like something I left in a toilet earlier today. Luckily we were stationed right next to the tennis team’s star, the number one varsity player Andrea Phillips. I don’t know that much about girl’s tennis but she seemed like she could play. After she easily defeated her opponent we decided that our job was done. We made some interviews with a couple of people and then we decided to go. On our way out we thought we would try to get one more angle of the game. We lifted the camera over the fence to get a blimp shot. After about 5 seconds our arms were tired and we stopped. With our first assignment in the bag, you can look forward to us video taping everything we can get our cameras on. Out.

-kevin

2003-09-03T20:41:00.000-07:00

Do you remember a while ago when I stated the question: Where did the name SEX WAX come from? Well, after some die-hard research I have come up with the answer. This answer is not for the faint of heart and if any of you reading this are on a metal lung, I suggest you stop reading. I first started my research by looking at its name. I noticed that the word SEX and the word WAX were present. This concluded my research. After pondering the facts, I came up with this answer. Maybe one day a surfer grabbed his “secret wax”, which he uses when he does the nasty, instead of his SURFING WAX and used it on his board. Later, when the surfer investigated as to why he had such a good day surfing, he might have stumbled upon the fact that he used his “secret wax” by mistake. Perhaps then, he let all his buddies try it on their boards. When the demand for the “secret wax” became too much, the surfer could have started his own company to produce it. When he had to think of what to call it, he could have remembered what it was first made for. Thus naming it SEX WAX. There you have it, the cold hard truth as to where that name came from. If you have any other names or expressions that you wont to know about, just send me an email and I’ll be sure to talk about them soon. Until then, I got to go SEX up my board till it rides the waves like a manta ray.

2003-09-02T22:22:00.000-07:00

Bo contributed today’s topic. It is as follows: how young people in the nation don't know shit about politics

This is a very good topic. Most kids in the nation don’t know shit about politics. Sure they all know that Arnold is running, but do they know what he stands for? I don’t think so. I don’t even know what he stands for. All I know is that he could kick my ass. That should be his slogan: “Vote for me or I’ll kick your ass.” Only a few people wouldn’t be scared of that slogan. I’m sure Arnold would just kill those few to show us that he is serious. Man, I should become a campaign manager.

The bigger question really is: Do young people even need to know about politics? Why would they? It’s not like they have a say or anything. Maybe just before they turn 18 they should take a class in politics. Because before then, even if they do know some stuff, all they can do is talk about it. Some people might say that people who are involved in politics when they are young will be better prepared for when they have the right to vote. And I’m also sure some people would say,” We have a mayor?” Cause some people are just dumb. So whether you know politics, or flip a coin to decide whom you vote for, it doesn’t really matter. Cause politics are rigged anyways.

-kevin

2003-09-01T20:26:00.000-07:00

Today’s topic is: Surfing. Dan Haiek gave me this topic for some reason. Maybe he has a secret craze for surfing. Anyways, when one thinks of surfing, you tend to think of a blonde dude who speaks in one-word sentences. For example: Dude! Man! Killer! Super! Richter! Bodacious! and Sweet! Another thing that comes to one’s mind when thinking of surfing is SEX WAX. Where the heck did that name come from? I don’t know but I could make some pretty saucy guesses. Something else that comes to mind is that girls have a strong attraction to these surfers. Is there something they like about long hair, a poor I.Q., and a confused facial expression? Perhaps they like that surfers wear tight wet suites. Then a girl could see everything. She would know exactly what the guy was packing. No surprises when they go back to his small shack on the beach. Maybe it will always be a mystery, or maybe I will become a surfer and find out myself. I’ll make sure to practice my DUDES!!! Catch you on the next wave bro.

-kevin

2003-08-31T22:29:00.000-07:00

I was at a family event yesterday and was unable to write an entry. I’m sorry and will try to make up for it tonight. I know school started a couple of days ago, but I would still like to talk about it. I want to say what I think the good sides of school are, and what the bad sides of school are.

I think the best aspect of school is that your friends are there. You see them almost everyday and you can do cool stuff with them. You can also talk to them about various things, like: Who you think the hottest girl is, who you think is the worst teacher, if you think you’re gonna commit suicide, and a bunch of other things like that. School is also good for meeting people of the opposite sex, or the same sex if that’s what floats your boat. School creates a unique environment where two people can meet, talk, make out, get in the back of a stinky old van and become lovers. School also gives you the opportunity to express yourself and to be involved in various clubs and organizations.

Other than the stuff I just mentioned, school is a drag. Homework, stress, and sadness are everyday events at school. If I counted how many times I was worried about doing well on a test, I would probably lose track and have to start over. Those aren’t really all the bad things about school but I am tired of writing junk so that concludes my entry for the night. ecaeP.

-kevin

2003-08-29T19:50:00.000-07:00

Today I had a hard time thinking of a topic. Instead of one big topic, I will have smaller and shorter ones. The first one is about cars. Have you ever heard someone say that when a guy buys a nice sports car he is making up for a small bojangle? Yes, I did make up that word. I actually made it up last year because I thought it sounded funny. Anyways, if that is true then what about the guy who buys a minicooper? Is he making up for a large bojangle? I just thought that was a funny idea and I hope you do too.

I guess my second and final topic is about Heavy Metal music. I for some reason have begun to like this style of music. I find it is very good to listen to while driving. It makes you think you are sick and a savage. It is also fun to step on the gas when the lead singer of a group starts to sing a high note. Of course when I step on the gas of my car it only goes five miles faster. So if you drive a nice car, one that moves, you should be careful when you step on it. That’s all I got to say, now I gotta go find where this pimp daddy keeps his globe.

2003-08-28T20:28:00.000-07:00

Tonight I’m gonna write about cheating. I am using two of my friends as examples. I don’t want them to get mad at me though, so I will call them friend J and friend D. These two friends of mine chose to take AP US History. As you all know, AP History has summer homework. Since these two guys are so smart, they decided to do the homework together. I guess they forgot to read the part that said you couldn’t work with partners. Anyways, after spending countless hours and after sacrificing time, which could be used to do other cool stuff, they were done. They were very pleased with themselves and thought they were both savages. When the time came they both turned in their homework to “Turn in Your Homework.com” Like all teachers who use this website, Mr. Goldstein compared their individual papers to other papers. Mr. Goldstein found out something interesting when he did this. Friend D and friend J’s papers were almost identical!!! So Mr. Goldstein called them in and said they both got a zero for their summer work. This means the highest grade they could get in the class was a C. At the news of this friend D and friend J decided to drop the class. So I leave you with this question. Is cheating a good thing or bad thing? It’s good when you don’t get caught, and bad when you do and can’t kill the guy who found out.

2003-08-27T18:04:00.000-07:00

Sorry I didn’t write anything on Tuesday, I was having too much fun going 35 in my Volvo. Anyway, today was the first day of school. It went ok in my book. I met my new teachers and most of them were all right. I think my Spanish teacher is a little off her rocker though. She has all these weird rules and junk. It's like a freaking military institute. She also kept making fun of this one heavy set kid. I don’t think she really knew what she was doing though. The first thing she said to the class was, “ Now we have a lot of people in this class and people need to be careful when the move around. As you can see, I am a small person. But someone like this (points to heavy set kid) is a very big person. So he might have to watch himself more.” The whole class was like HOLY CRAP!!! Then later on in the period we were doing some introduction game deal where you had to match something you like to the first letter of your name. When she got to the heavy set kid, his name starts with a c, she said,” Well, lets think, Oh!!! I know, comer!!! That means to eat, and you obviously like to eat.” After that the class did like a double HOLY CRAP!!!

The rest of my teachers were ok. I have some genius doctor dude as my math teacher and my english teacher is ok to. That’s all for today folks.

-kevin

2003-08-25T18:22:00.000-07:00

Today I got my license. I am now one of the many drivers in the world. My struggle for survival has just increased. Now not only do I have to survive thugs and thieves, but now I also gotta stay alive on the streets. People in other cars have become my enemies. They can take my life and I can take theirs. On a lighter note, I will no longer have to be that nice to my parents. No longer can they say,” If your not nice to us we wont drive you anywhere.” I am in charge now. I decide where I’ll be and how I will get there. Friend’s houses and places of interest are now at my fingertips. Beware all how read this because I could soon be pulling up to your house. No one can escape my 1983 Volvo station wagon!

If anyone wants to race my sweet set of wheels, call me and we will hook it up. We race for cash and we race to go fast. You pick the time; I’ll pick the place. If my car doesn’t start up, we will have to postpone the race. Ha, like that would ever happen.

-kevin

2003-08-24T21:42:00.000-07:00

Tonight�s topic is: why are young people turning ghetto? You see it everywhere you go. Look left; look right, there is always some dude trying to be ghetto. Whether its him wearing pants so low he almost trips, or whether they are popping some caps in some people asses. For some reason, the new fad is to be ghetto. Not knowing that much about the subject, I will still try to answer it correctly.
I first noticed people were turning ghetto around the 7th grade. People's shirts began to reach their knees and you couldn't tell whether they were wearing short pants or long shorts. In 8th grade it really hit me, mainly because I too was turning ghetto. I started hanging with a ghetto Asian crew. Soon I was break dancing and slapping bitches left and right. Okay, maybe I didn't slap anyone, but I was still pretty ghetto. Then around the middle of my 8th grade year I was invited to a fight. When my friends started to talk about whether there should be weapons or not, I knew I was pretty ghetto. Through the first half of my freshman year I continued to be a thug. Then it hit me. What the hell was I doing? I was wearing clothes so large I could use my shirt as a tent. Anyways, after that I stopped being ghetto and started being a skater. I guess I really haven't answered the topic question. I really answered why I turned ghetto. Oh well, I don't want to write it all over. Peace.

-kevin

2003-08-23T22:54:00.000-07:00

The topic of the night is why the nighttime is good. After doing some research I have come up with an answer. The nighttime is very important to every animal. It is a time to sleep for some, and a time to hunt for others. Sometimes the ones hunting wake up the ones sleeping and make the ones sleeping angry. Then the no longer sleeping ones take out a shotgun and shoot the hunting ones. Another good part of the night time is that it is dark. You can sneak around and no one can see you. I guess they could see you if you were in a lighted room, or they had night goggles, or you were wearing a glow in the dark suite. But usually you could get by undetected.
Nighttime is also a good time for a certain physical activity which involves humping and moaning. You might have seen this activity in a number of movies, or perhaps you practice it yourself. Although this activity can be practiced at any time of the day, night is by far the best time. You can wake up people next door and make them angry and jealous. That was about all my research covered so I leave you now. Good night and good night time.

-kevin

2003-08-23T22:41:00.000-07:00

Due to a request by Bo I will now only write about interesting events in my day. Some of his examples were: like...hootie ate an apple and spit it out, or an epiphany of some kind, like you just realized the world is small.
Thank you Bo for the epiphany. I was lost there for a while. But from now on, only interesting events. I thank you for your good advice and I am sure other people will also.

-kevin

2003-08-23T22:09:00.000-07:00

I messed up on my blog. The certain test isn't till Monday. And, after thinking about what I said about the people who were interested in Star Wars I felt bad. They are just into it a lot and that’s cool. I am into some weird stuff like that and I wouldn't want someone else to think I was weird. Plus those dudes are my friends so I shouldn't have said that junk. Man when did I get a conscience? Oh well, post to you later.

-kevin

2003-08-23T19:14:00.000-07:00

Today I went to a madrigal dinner thing. It was ok if you like doing nothing and talking about random stuff. I did get to talk to some girls about thong underwear though. That's always a plus. We had hotdogs and hamburgers for dinner and they weren't that good. They were burned blacker than a black crayon. Biting into the burger was like trying to eat a piece of cardboard. I just put mass amounts of catsup on the burger to solve this problem. After everyone I knew left I was forced to watch the Star Wars movie. Luckily I was saved when someone offered me a ride.
Some people are crazy into Star Wars. When we were watching it, every five seconds someone would stop the movie and talk about Stat Wars stuff. They would talk about which book what character was from and junk. I didn't even know there were books! Oh well, I guess some people are into weird stuff. That was about all that happened today. My post tomorrow will either be a happy one or a sad one. Depending on the outcome of a certain test. Peace out.

-kevin